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28 Oct 2026

What Your Kids Don’t Show You

“I don’t show it, so you don’t know it.”

Over the past 20 years, I’ve had many conversations with kids. One thing I’ve learned is what kids show you on the outside doesn’t always reflect what they’re feeling on the inside.

The words below are written from a child’s point of view, reflecting feelings and experiences I’ve heard them share over the years. As you read, I invite you to think about what your child might be feeling but not expressing.

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What Your Kids Don’t Show You About Their Feelings

I don’t always tell you everything that’s going on in my life.

I might say I’m fine when you ask how my day was. I might go to school, hang out with my friends, laugh, and carry on like everything is okay.

It isn’t always.

Maybe something happened with a friend. Maybe I’m worried about fitting in, struggling with schoolwork, or trying to deal with something that’s been bothering me.

I keep a lot to myself, even when part of me wants to talk. Sometimes, I just don’t always know how to start the conversation or explain what’s going on.

I’m afraid you’ll make a big deal out of something or tell me not to worry.

I know you want to help, but I don’t always need you to fix things or tell me what to do. Sometimes, I just need you to listen and try to understand how I’m feeling.

Knowing you’re there to listen without judgment makes it easier for me to open up.

I may not show it, but I still need you.

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A question for parents to reflect on:

How can you make it easier for your child/children to tell you when something is bothering them?

With my son, I’ve learned that bedtime is often when he’s most willing to share and reflect on his day. I’ve also realized that laughter and humour help us connect and make it easier for him to open up.

This is what I know: You can’t always know what your child is feeling. Finding ways to connect and making space for your child to open up takes time, patience, and a willingness to keep listening.

Until next time…

3 Sep 2026

Before You Say “Don’t Worry”

Helping kids with anxiety starts with letting them know it’s okay to feel nervous or anxious.

Instead of trying to make those feelings go away, give them tools to work through them.

Here’s how you can help:

1. Connect before you redirect.

Find out what’s worrying them. Maybe they’re thinking:

“What if my friends aren’t in my class?”

“What if I don’t like my teacher?”

Share a time when you felt nervous or anxious.

2. Help them create a different story.

Ask: “What if you were being brave? What happens?”

Help them imagine what could go right, not just what could go wrong.

3. Have them come up with something to tell themselves.

“I’ve got this!”

“I’m going to have fun!”

“I love new adventures!”

“I’m enough.”

This is what I know: They can’t always choose how they feel, but you can help them find the courage to move forward.

Until next time…

13 May 2026

Are Your Kids Being Judged?

People will judge no matter what – so be you.

That’s an important message for kids. Because no matter how they are being, someone will have something to say:

  • That was wrong.
  • You should’ve done that differently.
  • Try harder.
  • Not good enough

Kids hear this constantly, and it shows up everywhere – in group chats, classrooms, sports teams, social media. It creates pressure to be someone they’re not. And depending on the moment, that pressure can show up as embarrassment, frustration, sadness, or anxiety.

When they don’t know what to do with those feelings, judgment can start to feel like it’s about who they are, not just what someone thinks.

That’s where resilience starts – not in avoiding judgment, but in how kids being judged respond to what it brings up inside them.

That shift matters.

Instead of believing what they hear, they can pause and think: “This is someone’s opinion. It doesn’t define me.”

From there, they can remind themselves:

  • I can handle someone disagreeing with me.
  • I know how to calm myself.
  • I am OK with not being understood.
  • I don’t have to change who I am to fit in everywhere.

This is what I know: The goal isn’t raising kids who never get judged. The goal is raising kids who believe in themselves regardless of judgments.

Until next time…