November 2025

Naming ‘the elephant’ Builds Connection

Last week, I walked into my presentation with a bandage on my forehead. Before I started, I told the students what happened: I had tripped, hit my forehead, and ended up with a small cut.

Why did I start there? Because otherwise it would have been the elephant in the room and kids always notice ‘the elephant’. If we don’t explain, they fill in the gaps with their own guesses, worries, or assumptions.

Sharing what’s happening shows kids that it’s okay to notice, ask questions and share how they feel – the keys to building connection with kids in everyday interactions.

Ways to Connect
1. Name it: Tell them what’s happening when they notice something.
2. Keep it simple: A short, honest explanation is enough.
3. Invite conversation: Encourage questions and let them share their feelings.

When you do this, you are showing children that they can trust their observations and their feelings.

This is what I know: They will learn they are not alone, that feelings matter, and that mistakes are part of life – all essential for building connection with kids and helping them grow into compassionate, confident, and resilient people.

Until next time…

12 Nov 2025

‘It wasn’t me – it was them.’

We’ve all heard those words.

Taking responsibility isn’t always easy for kids. It can stir up uncomfortable emotions — shame, frustration, embarrassment, sadness, and sometimes even pride.

It’s much easier for kids to point the finger somewhere else.

Here’s the truth: When kids take responsibility, they also take back their power — the power to grow, to shift, and to become their best selves.

It’s about owning what they can control — their choices. That’s where change happens. That’s where confidence is built.

Here’s something I use with my son when he says, “It wasn’t me.” I pause and calmly ask, “What emotion is making it hard to accept responsibility?”

Here’s the bigger picture: when kids take responsibility for their feelings and choices, they stop being victims of their circumstances. They become the authors of their own story — a story where accountability builds character, confidence, and self-respect.

This is what I know: Yes, it’s a process. And yes, it will take time. But every step toward ownership is a step toward confidence, resilience, and understanding themselves a little better.

Until next time…