life skills for kids Archives

6 Nov 2024

Guiding Children’s Choices

Just like a GPS needs a destination to guide us, our brain also works best when it focuses on a specific end result. Similarly, having a clear destination can guide children’s choices, helping them navigate challenges with confidence and purpose.

In life, a child’s ‘GPS destination’ needs to be rooted in their character. This gives them a clear sense of direction, helping them make choices that align with their character. Just like a GPS needs a destination to guide us, our brain also works best when it focuses on a specific end result.

When they don’t have a ‘character destination’ like kindness, honesty, responsibility and determination to help guide their choices, they can easily become sidetracked by their emotions and life’s challenging circumstances.

Three Tips to Help Your Child Set Their ‘Character Destination’

1. Discuss Character Traits: Help them figure out three-character traits they would like to be known for (use this worksheet for inspiration). Encourage them to think about how they might put each chosen trait into practice. This makes character traits real and achievable.

2. Compliment Character: When your child demonstrates their chosen character trait, be specific in your praise. For example, if they chose kindness and helped a struggling friend, say, “I noticed how kind you were when you helped your friend.” By recognizing their efforts, you reinforce how their character destination can guide children’s choices in positive and meaningful ways.

3. Encourage Reflection on Choices: At the end of the day, help your child reflect on how their choices aligned (or didn’t) with their ‘character destination’. Remind them that emotions can sometimes pull them off course. When that happens, reassure them that it’s okay to pause, reset and refocus on making choices based on their character.

This is what I know: By helping your child create and follow a ‘character destination’, you’re giving them a ‘roadmap’ to navigate life’s ups and downs. This strategy not only builds resilience but also guides children’s choices ensuring they stay true to the character traits that matter most to them.

Until next time…

21 Mar 2024

How to Help Kids When They Act Out

Sometimes kids act out without being mindful of their words and actions, which may result in misunderstandings. And when that happens it can be embarrassing and frustrating, not only for us, but also for them.

How we help kids when they act out, is what matters.

Below are strategies I use with my son:

1. Encourage reflection: Prompt your child to reflect on their actions and consider how they could have handled the situation differently. Encourage them to think about the impact of their words and actions on themselves and others.

2. Cultivate empathy: Help your child consider the feelings of others by prompting them to reflect on how their actions might affect others. Ask them to reflect how they think their actions may impact others and encourage them to consider the feelings of others. Acknowledge and praise children when they demonstrate thoughtfulness and mindfulness in their words and actions.

3. Teach problem-solving skills: Help your child develop problem-solving skills by discussing different ways to approach situations and brainstorming possible solutions together. Encourage them to think about potential consequences before acting.

4. Promote self-compassion: It’s natural to feel guilt and sadness after mistreating someone, even if it was unintentional. Guide your child to apologize, forgive themselves and focus on the lessons learned. Teach them to be kind to themselves when they mess up.

This is what I know: Establishing a nurturing environment when kids act out fosters an atmosphere where children feel safe to share their thoughts and emotions and where they feel supported in their efforts to learn and grow.

12 Oct 2023

How to Handle Kids’ Disappointments and Strengthen Bonds

Life is a series of ups and downs and it’s natural for children to face disappointment along the way.

When my son confides in me about a disappointment, my natural instinct is to think of solutions and ways to fix it, especially if he is feeling sad and dejected.

Disappointments are valuable life lessons that help develop skills like perseverance, empathy, resilience and problem-solving. If you try to protect them from disappointment, it will stop them from developing these essential skills. Without a healthy approach to disappointments, a young person can feel like a failure, causing them to give up or quit.

Below are four strategies to help you and the child in your life effectively deal with disappointment:

1. Acknowledge Emotions

Let them know that it’s okay to feel disappointed and that it’s an emotion that everyone encounters at various times in their life. Remember to acknowledge your own emotions when you see a child experiencing disappointment. Being able to feel your own discomfort is an important part of teaching them to lean into uncomfortable emotions.

2. Validate Emotions

Refrain from dismissing their emotions. Avoid phrases like “It’s not a big deal” or “You’re overreacting.” Such statements invalidate their emotions and can make them feel unheard or misunderstood. Instead, validate their emotions by saying, ‘I understand you’re feeling really disappointed right now’ or ‘That must have been really tough for you.’

3. Teach Emotional Management Strategies

Help them identify healthy ways to release their emotions that bring them comfort and calmness when they are upset, such as deep breathing, counting to ten, or finding an activity that relaxes them.

4. Encourage a Problem-Solving Mindset

Together brainstorm potential solutions or strategies to improve the situation. This approach gives them a plan to better prepare them for handling future disappointments.

Providing a supportive and understanding environment goes a long way to helping a child not only navigate disappointment, but also develop resilience.

Until next time…